


Leo and Usagi's Lame Adventure

by crazycatlady713



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Alice in Wonderland References, Bad Poetry, Crossover, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Talking Animals
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-09
Updated: 2015-04-09
Packaged: 2018-03-22 02:23:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3711280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crazycatlady713/pseuds/crazycatlady713
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Not every foray into Wonderland is necessarily wonderful...<br/>(my entry into the March contest for Writer's Nexus on DA)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Leo and Usagi's Lame Adventure

**Author's Note:**

> The goal for this particular entry was to write a short story or poem using [Let's Go On A Mission by AnoSheakai](http://anosheakai.deviantart.com/art/Let-s-Go-On-A-Mission-490122023) as a prompt. I hope you like. :-)

Beneath a tree our hero slept quite soundly  
When a smartly-dressed hare came a-bounding  
"Come with me!" he cried so profoundly  
"Or we'll be late for an adventure most astounding!"

A world filled with strangeness and wonder Leo espied  
Aghast he said, "where the heck am I this time?"  
"Hurry Leo-san!" The most anxious rabbit cried  
"And why am I compelled to speak in rhyme?"

"Leo-san, there is no time to explain!  
Now hurry, or we'll be late for the game!"  
"B-but, why am I dressed like a french maid!?  
And wherever you're taking me better not be lame!"

"Its a _pinafore_ Leo-san," the rabbit tersely said  
and on down the lane he led the confused terrapin  
" _She_ awaits," he went on, "now hurry, or you'll lose your head!"  
"Pssh," Leo scoffed, "she sounds like a real harridan."

"You have _no_ idea," Usagi said rather stiffly  
"Now please, or we'll be late! Hurry now, quickly!"  
"No!" Leo cried from atop a 'shroom. "I look like a sissy!  
It isn't fair! Why do _you_ get to look so spiffy!?"

"Nice dress, dingus!" sneered a rotund caterpillar  
To which Leo cried, "I beg your pardon, good sir?"  
"You heard me, doofus! You look like a big, green Phyllis Diller!"  
"Say that to my face!" he called, his voice growing shriller

"You wanna fight me!?" the creature replied, "Oh puh-lease!"  
"Think you're a tough guy, huh?" Leo said, rolling up his sleeves  
"If we are late," Usagi warned, "the queen will be most displeased!"  
"The only queen I see is right here!" The bug said with a wheeze

That was it! Leo had enough of this ill-mannered larva!  
He leapt up and cried, "Fight you? Of course I wanna!"  
He kicked it and punched it and proceeded to carve a  
Lovely "L" in its green hide with his trusty katana

Now Leo's tolerance level for weirdness had reached its peak,  
And toward the Queen's gardens the pair steadily did creep,  
When a bread-and-butterfly alighted gracefully upon his beak,  
"You look stupid," it said. To which he replied, "kiss my *bleep*!"

"Its about time!" The Queen complained, a scowl on her face  
The ever-loyal Usagi replied, "Please forgive us, your grace!"  
"Let's get this going!" Leo moaned, smoothing his petticoat's lace  
"I just want this to be over, so I can get out of this place!"

"Oh you are in for a treat, Leo-san!" replied his furry valet,  
As he handed him a mallet, with which to play croquet.  
" _This_ is your idea of an adventure?" Leo said with dismay  
"You _do_ know my brothers and I face aliens and monsters each day?"

He threw the mallet down with a disgusted sigh,  
And fled straightaway to the flashing red "exit" sign  
Back beneath the tree he was when he opened his eyes  
"Never again," he said, "Will I eat Mikey's mushroom pizza surprise!"


End file.
